The opinions shared on this entry, do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the writer. It’s just today, the writer is in a pretty shitty mood. So bear with her, okay?
Maybe it’s because I haven’t really spoke up for myself in the past. I t could be possibly that I like to think things through and never been that great at coming up with things on my feet. Maybe it’s because I allow myself to become a soundboard to people who just need to get it off their chest….and instead, they proceed to take their frustrations out on me. Whatever the case is, I’m done. I’m tired of being people’s scapegoat when someone else pisses them off. Growing up, it was my mother who would verbally abuse and become passive-aggressive, instead of dealing with the fact that she was frustrated at work. My friends, instead of understanding that I can’t be in 1,000 places at once, decide that I’m the “bad friend” and that I don’t “follow through” like I should, but only for them. Eff other friends or obligations that I may have; when you care about somebody, you make time for them. That’s the saying, right? Maybe it’s easier to have someone take the brunt of your pain so that you can sleep easier. After all, energy is neither lost nor destroyed; just transferred from one party to the next. So what happens to me? Where do I turn and where do I go when people have designated me their go-to scapegoat?
Who becomes the scapegoat for the scapegoat? Or is “working on our own shit” too much of a stretch? Until then….just blame me.