100 Questions: Day 55

What emotion have I been hiding? 

Love for myself. I thought about this yesterday on the train ride home. Day in and day out, I would fantasize about saying “I love you” to someone and having them say it back. Be it an ex or someone new or even a complete stranger, I long to hear and say those words. 

But yesterday, I was thinking about my re-surfaced ex and how he showed me how to love again when something said, “He didn’t teach you anything that you weren’t willing to learn on your own” and I was brought to tears. I started searching within and realized that this entire time, I have been looking for my love outward when what I needed was within me. But what does it look like? Feel like? Sound like? 

How do I show myself love when I’ve always looked to others to do it for me? 

Tarot Card of the Day: Eight of Swords. Surrounded by threats and obstacles on all sides, you find yourself the victim. You see no way out; no available choices. Your perception keeps you from opening your wings and taking flight. What keeps you suspended here? The Eight of Swords demands an answer. You can’t hang here much longer. 

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